The Great Escape pt 5

I really have to finish this memoir, I've been paying too much attention to the other. Try to keep up!

Part 5: I Was Sternly Told Not to Yodel
Even though my aunt was hurt, she still took me to the lockers so I could change into my street clothes. Then, while she visited the infirmary, my Uncle Russell took me on some rides. I don't remember all the rides he took me on, nor do I remember the chronological order I went on these rides. This was ten years ago, after all; I cannot be expected to remember everything. . My memory of this trip is very shaky, and while I can tell you what I rode, I can not tell you when I rode it or in what order. It's very frustrating that I can not tell you this story in chronological order, but I suppose it is not very important.

I do remember my uncle taking me on a miniature ferris wheel, where the gondolas are shaped like yellow, red and aqua air balloons. It was kind of boring, I don't remember enjoying it. I also found myself on The Flying Elephants, a kiddie ride where you sit in a bad rip-off of Dumbo and go around in a circle, while you use a joy stick to make yourself move up and down in the air. It was pretty boring, and I kept my hand on the joy stick's little button, so I stayed up in the air for the entire ride. I hadn't even thought of making my elephant move up and down.

I was desperate to go on rides, it had become an obsession. I wanted to experience everything I could. So I flitted from ride to ride in the Fest Area, which was how I ended up on those damn elephants and few other baby rides. Some rides, I found I was too big to go on, such the Motorcycle Carousel or the Flying Dragons.
One of the other kiddies rides I had gotten on in my desperation was a tractor trailer themed ride called The Convoy. It consisted of miniature tractor trailers that slowly moved around a slightly curvy track. The tricks seat two people. One person sits inside the truck, while another person can sit on a little seat situated on top; each seat has a little steering wheel, so you can pretend you're really driving a freight truck. When it was my turn to get on, the woman operating the ride asked me if I wanted to sit inside one of the little trucks. I told her no, I would sit on one of the upper seats. I must have figured that it was bad enough that I was riding this idiotic thing, why further compromise my dignity and self-respect? Also, it looked like I would be too tall to sit inside, sitting on top of the mock tractor trailer was a sound decision.
The ride was boring. It was so boring, that I actually remember how dull it was. I tried to pass the time I was wasting on this ride by pretending I was really a trucker. It helped a little, but not much.

At one point, I also rode the Bumper Cars. While in line, I made a tit of myself trying to talk to some boys close to my age. I fumbled my words, and they laughed at me. Later, when I was out on the floor, they bumped me mercilessly with their cars, still laughing. I had trouble steering, and trouble braking the stupid car and if I recall correctly, the damn thing eventually broke down! My initiation into the bumper cars did not go well, and as a result, I rarely ride them. I find that people get too aggressive during this ride. Also, when you do get hit by another car, it does hurt. On one hand, they can be a lot of fun, but on the other hand, they can be very unpleasant.

The best ride I went on during this trip was The Himalaya. If I've got my history right, Himalayas were invented sometime in the late 19th to early 20th centuries. A train of cars speeds around on a bumpy track, and the breeze this produces cooled off riders in the summer months. Because of this, it was named after the cold winds of the Himalaya mountains.
The Himalaya ride at The Great Escape is called the Cannonball Express. It has some kind of swinging 60's-70's theme, with large pop art flowers, and figures of go go dancers and funky fresh dudes. It's colorful, alive with purples, sky blues, goldenrod yellows and aqua greens. Every time I go to the Great Escape, I ride it, except for once, when I went with Families First. During that trip I only went on two rides because the chaperon took us home early. She did not know how to handle my panic attacks and thought I had been misbehaving.

My uncle and I got in one of the cars, my uncle sitting on the outside, for he was taller. We buckled in, then pulled the lap bar down. The ride was fast and exciting, and music played the entire time, adding to the experience. I slid around in the vinyl-covered long seat, bumping into my uncle. I gripped the bar, straining my muscles from trying to keep from sliding around too much. I was having so much fun!
The ride slowed down after a few minutes. I assumed it was over, until it started moving again, only backwards. This was even more fun than going forwards, it was the best part of the ride. Sadly, they stopped making it go backwards a few years ago. I was very disappointed when I learned this. I never found out why made this decision either, but I think I shall ask someone, someday.

Eventually, the party re-grouped and the it was decided that we would ride The Comet. The Comet is a wooden roller coaster. In another memoir, I discussed riding it's doppelganger at Hershey Park, another wooden coaster of the same name, and an identical track.
My first ride on a wooden roller coaster was traumatizing. It was fast, rickety and the heights were terrifying. I love that coaster now, but as I kid I was terrified.
After that, we rode the Pirate Ship. Ship rides come in different themes, Viking, Pirate, even Nile themes tend to pop up. At The Great Escape, theirs is a pirate ship. Like most rides, I used to really hate this one, but now it's a favorite. As an adult, they're not as scary as they used to be for me.
My uncle led me to sit in the way back, the best part to sit. In fact, whenever you're in line for The Pirate Ship, it's a rule that the first place to get filled up is the back, because everybody wants to sit there. You can hope you'll get a back seat, but the fact is, the skanky teenage girls in front of you will sit there, forcing you to sit in the second to last row or even further up, near the mast.
But we were lucky enough to get the coveted back seat and I was especially lucky to get it on my maiden voyage (forgive the pun). We sat down and lowered the lap bar.

"When the ride is in the air, lean forward," My uncle told me. Being young and impressionable, I would do as he said, not even wondering why he had asked such a thing of me.
The ride started, swinging back and forth, simulating a ship tossing in the waves. When the side of the ride my uncle and I were sitting was up in the air, I did as my uncle said, and leaned forward, my bottom lifting off the hard plastic seat. I was already frightened by being so high up in the air and leaning forward added to my fear, for it caused a strange weightless feeling. I screamed, and never leaned forward again.

Afterwards, my sister went on more water rides, but I did not, instead my Aunt took me back to the fest area so I could go on more rides, It was during this time that I rode a few of the rides I described earlier, including The Convoy and The Elephants. At one point, I tried to convince my aunt that I wanted to go on the Rotor, a ride that spun so fast, you stuck to the walls while the floor dropped out from under you. She let me get in line, but when she warned me how sick it would make me I changed my mind. I also tried to get in line for a strange looking kiddie ride that consisted of an oval track and little cars shaped like mice. Unfortunately, it must have been closed down for some time, because there wasn't anyone else waiting in line or even a park employee to operate it. But I didn't realize that. I stood there, waiting, completely oblivious to the concept of the ride being closed. After all, there wasn't a sign indicating that this was so. Eventually, I shuffled off to find something else. Instead, I got to ride The Swings, which at the Great Escape they call The Flying Trapeze. I had always wanted to ride one of these, ever since I had watched my sisters ride it at the fair when I was four, and I could not, because of my size. But now six years later I was tall enough. So I got in one of the metal swings, dangling from long chains, pulled the bar down over my lap and clipped the safety chains together. My Aunt did not get on with me, but sat on a low wall nearby and watched.
I enjoyed the ride, while those swings spun around, quick as you please. It was kind of high up, yet I was not afraid, for the ride was gentler than a Pirate Ship or a Roller Coaster. I looked down at my aunt, and waved at her, which I imagine a lot of kids do when the adults with them let them ride by themselves. She waved back and I smiled. When I got off the ride, I gushed about not being afraid.

Like I mentioned repeatedly, I do not remember the chronological order I went on the rides, I really don't. I'm probably getting this all wrong, I could have gone on the swings before I rode the Comet or after I rode the Alpine Bobsled. Wait, I haven't mentioned the Alpine Bobsled? I should probably cover that, shouldn't I?

I don't remember at which point I rode the Alpine Bobsled. The Bobsled is a roller coaster, which instead of rolling on traditional tracks, goes down a chute, just like real bobsledding. It's actually really dangerous for a roller coaster, and a woman died when it went off the 'track'. But as a kid, I did not know that. I only knew that it was a long line. While we waited, my Aunt Amy brushed my hair, as it had gotten tangled. She mentioned that I had split ends. Curious, I asked her what that meant as she braided my hair. She told me it meant the ends of my hair was splitting in two.

The bobsled cars have the flags of different countries on them, keeping up with the Olympic theme. There was America, Switzerland, Italy, Germany, France, England and to my amusement, Jamaica. Those are the only ones I remember. We got Switzerland, and I was sternly told not to yodel.
The ride goes pretty fast, and you get knocked around pretty easy from all the jolts and sharp, swooping turns, but I liked it because it wasn't as high up as the other roller coasters. I also ignored the warning about yodeling, and gave some pitiful attempts at the vocal art, though my Aunt Amy would later claim I was a very good yodeler, in the way that adults tell you you're good at something, when you're really not. When you were a kid, did you ever try something, and know that you fucked up, yet your parents or teachers or relatives still told you you were good?

Soon enough the day had begun to wind down. We had a few rides left to go on, and then we would leave. But to hear about that, dear reader, you will have to wait until the next and final installment of this memoir.