And here we are, at the third and final volume of the tedious and self-indulgent memoir I have embarked upon.
Part 1: An Autistic Squirrel
I woke on Sunday morning, to bright sunlight streaming into the small apartment. The day of the Vow Renewal. It was already sticky and humid and we had much to do before we left. We had to deflate the air mattresses, pack everything up and get dressed.
I dressed simply in a hot pink, nearly magenta, cotton and crocheted lace skirt that fell just above my knee, a black tank top and a pair of flip flops. I wrapped my large black and white gauze scarf over my shoulders like a shawl, and put on my jewelry.
For such a simple outfit, it had been such an odyssey getting it together. Months ago, when I first learned of the vow renewal, I had already begun planning what I would wear. The original idea was to make a sun dress, out of black cotton printed with cherries, but I couldn't find a flattering pattern. So then I had decided to make a skirt out of muslin, dyed purple, we'd even purchased the dye, but we never got around to it. So in the end, I decided to wear what I already had. It saved time and money.
Once dressed, I did my makeup. Concealer and powder to hide the sunburn on my nose, soft lime green eyeshadow, mascara, bright pink lipstick. The effect turned out out great. For once, my skin actually looked flawless. I was rather impressed with my appearance.
After everyone had dressed, and we had gathered up the deflated mattresses, our bedding and our bags; we loaded everything back in the car and left for the wedding. We stopped at Dunkin' Donuts for breakfast. Their breakfast sandwiches are pretty damn delicious, even if their coffee tastes like dish soap.
I don't remember much about the drive over, other than it being very warm. I was in a sour mood, mostly due to anxiety. I always feel out of place at family functions, so I can't help but feel nervous whenever I go to one.
We stopped at a country store to use the bathroom and pick up some chicken for the barbecue. I love country stores, especially ones in rural areas. They always have interesting things, like local products and novelty candy. This country store even had a little miniature golf course. I would have enjoyed playing a round, but we did not have the time.
When we arrived at the cabin, a few of the guests were already there. I felt awkward as I greeted family members, I don't know why. I'm just a socially awkward person, I suppose. Once I'm at my ease, I can be rather charming, but in the first uneasy minutes, I can be as about as exciting as an autistic squirrel. Actually, that does sound interesting, never mind. Ignore that simile, please.
I don't remember too much. This was all a year ago, after all. I recall doing the usual schmoozing, and socializing. I remember trying an ale, called Old Speckled Hen. At first I liked it, but then I found I had no taste for ale. I've always preferred hard cider, or as I've recently discovered, Smirnoff Ice. I couldn't finish it. I don't even think I finished a quarter of the bottle. In fact, as I was drinking, I was starting to feel surly, and agitated. This happens to me quite often. If I drink when I'm anxious, I end up in a foul mood. If I drink when I'm in a good mood, I end up giggly. Since I was already tense, being at a family event and all, you can imagine where my mood shifted. I put down the bottle, and didn't touch any booze for the rest of the day.
The ceremony was at noon. The minister had arrived, the whole family had shown up and my Aunt Jenny had changed into her wedding dress. She looked lovely. It was white, with an empire waist, and some beading. I told her she looked beautiful. My Uncle Ben wore a Hawaiian shirt.
Everyone was starting to head down to the scenic area where the ceremony would be held. I was still feeling all out of sorts, so I popped an Ativan, and joined my mother and sister to watch two people renew their vows.
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